What’s Beef?

Protect ya neck!

Rush Limbaugh is fucking up.

I used to work the door at a nightclub (which is entire book unto itself) and I got friendly with the bouncers.  As such, I was often privy to the sage wisdom they could provide on life and survival not just in the club, but in life in general.  One bouncer in particular always seemed to break it down best.  His name was Frank.

Now, when you apply for a regular job you submit a resume and sit down for a protracted interview with management and explain why your services would be appreciated and applicable in the environment that they’re in, being a bouncer ain’t like that.  Basically, your resume is the list of folks’ asses you’ve kicked and the various instances in which you’ve had to dole out a “correction” or two… it also doesn’t hurt if you have a few interesting scars, scars are cool too… But I digress.

One night, Frank and I were talking and I told him about a bartender at another club who had said some pretty unsavory things about him the night before.  I mean, dude was talking sporty about him and basically said that he hoped bad things happened to him.  I asked Frank how him and that guy get into such a beef.  He taught me one of the best lessons I’ve learned in life…

Frank: “We don’t have beef.  I could cave that muthafucka’s chest in any time, any day, any place if I wanted to.  I fuck fools up for a living, he pours drinks.  Its not beef, I’m a guy who could destroy him, he’s just a muthafucka talking.”

Simple lesson- It ain’t beef if you aren’t on equal footing.

That’s why FAMU can’t claim a rivalry with the University of Florida.  That’s why Bow Wow can’t claim a beef with Jay-Z.  And that’s why Rush Limbaugh can’t really have a beef with Barack Obama.  Muhfuckas ain’t on the same footing.

Obama is the president and current leader of the free world.

Limbaugh is a muthafucka talking.

I think, more so than anything else in this whole Rush vs. Barack thing, there’s not an ideological difference on policy as much as there is an issue of Limbaugh just not liking black people.  Really, Rush just don’t like niggas.  The folly on Limbaugh’s part is that he’s gotten himself into a position where now he’s the defacto leader of the Republican party (sorry Mr. Steele) and now his mouth has written some pretty hefty checks that his ass is gonna be forced to cash.

When you’re a talking head on the radio stating your disagreements with policy or ideology you’re rightfully exercising your right to free speech… You’re like the bartender talking reckless about a bouncer because he got the girl you couldn’t get.  But when you explicitly state that you hope that the president fails and then make it a point to have the members of your party kiss your ring and come out and atone for crossing you (see: Bailout Vote, Republicans in The House), then you enter the realm of accountability for your statements… that’s like the bartender taking it one step further and stepping to the bouncer ready to fight.

And let me be clear here… I’m a blogger… I’m just a muhfucka with an opinion and time to type it… I’m not better or worse than Rush in that sense.

But the difference is that I ask for no accountability for my opinions.  I just want you to read this shit and laugh.

Now, if I said that I hope something fails and then lay out a specific plan of action to pursue its failure, then I move out of opinion and into participation and once I participate, then I’m accountable.

Nah Rush, this ain’t what you want.

You don’t want beef like this, homey… You just a muhfucka that talks shit, don’t trifle with the people who actually DO shit.  That accountability is a muhfucka and when people start following you and doing what you told them to do, you’re gonna hafta answer to someone if your shit don’t work.

You don’t want to wind up like Dee Barnes catching the two piece and no biscuit from Dr. Dre.  Or even worse, like Wendy Williams who’s credibility is all but gone after fomenting false beef after false beef.  But that’s the path Mr. Limbaugh’s heading down.

Someone tell that fool to calm down, pop a few pills and chill.